Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Wanted: An Entourage

The relocation process has started. I have been explaining to people that for awhile now we have been waiting for things to happen. The relocation is this huge boulder sitting at the top of a hill. You get the call from your "Relocation Coordinator" and the boulder starts to shake. You get the call from your "Relocation Counselor" and boulder starts to roll. You get calls from morgatge representatives, realtors, your counselor again, and paper work arrives that HAS to get back right NOW. The boulder is big and now it has picked up speed. It is barreling down toward you.

This is where I feel like Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark. I need to get my hat, whip, and keep running. The problem with Indiana Jones is that he is often dirty, and I am sure he likes sleeping outside. He deals with bugs and snakes. I won't even camp unless I am in a building with a bathroom, attached. No walking through the woods for me, no way. I am also not a fan of bugs. They are fine, outside. I will stay inside and let them be. If they appear on my turf, they have to expect consequences. So I have devised another plan.

I can move pretty fast. I will dodge the boulder and assemble an Entourage. A nice full staff to get me through this transition. I want a personal assistant to organize my lists and life. They can send the emails out, mail the paperwork, and take my messages from the Relocation Posse. I could hire an interior decorator/stager to help make the house perfect for selling. I don't need a personal chef because I can handle that. I will need someone to keep the house clean though. To round out the team a publicist would be great. Someone to let Chicago and Naperville know I am coming and how cool I am. Since I don't have an Entourage, and won't be getting one soon. I guess I better keep running, pick up my hat, my whip, and get this house sold. It is always nice to dream though.

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